The Apathetic Christian Man
By Michael Shipman
We are living in a time when men, across all spectrums, are falling into the trap of apathy. What is apathy? Websters-Merriam Dictionary defines apathy as “lack of feeling or emotion” and “lack of interest and concern.” (Dictionary 2022) This is a good definition and is closely related to what the Bible would describe as a sluggard or sloth (Proverbs has 12 passages that deal specifically with this issue: Proverbs 6:6, 6:9, 13:4, 19:24, 20:4, 21:25, 22:13, 24:30, 26:13-16). What is key to understanding the sluggard in Proverbs is that he is dedicated to doing nothing, but expecting something, if not, everything. In our day, we call this laziness. Certainly, this is an issue in our day, and it is related to apathy, but I am more interested in exploring those situations when a man has ceased from his engagement with God, wife, children, and fellow believers.
The goal of this blog post is to discover the reasons for this apathy and then to lay out a biblical solution for the apathetic Christian man; I will briefly discuss false solutions. The primary text that I will be working from is from Ephesians 5:1-2, 25-33 and Colossians 3:1-10. I will set out to show and prove that the solution to apathy within men is not more church activity but rather, a constant, deep, intentional “heart gaze” at the glory of Jesus Christ found only in the pages of Sacred Holy Scripture.
The Problem
It doesn't take much biblical research to discover that apathy within men has literally been a problem since Genesis chapter 3. In that chapter, Adam did not properly love his wife, he did not properly protect his wife, and he did not properly instruct his wife. Rather it seems that he (for reasons unknown to us) decided to take the shameful road of apathy and permit his wife to walk into a scenario where she was deceived, tempted, and led into sin with the serpent. Therefore, it would not be too drastic of a statement to say the sin of the world and the curse that is connected with that sin is a result of Adam’s apathy in the garden. With the reality of the fall in place, and God's judgement now residing upon humanity it has become clear that apathy is certainly a sinful inclination that most, if not all men suffer from. What must be recognized is that this is not a root issue of motivation, creativity, or ingenuity. This is a root condition of the heart towards God and toward our fellow man.
This type of spiritual apathy is the reason that David fell into an adulterous relationship with Bathsheba. It is the reason that Judas played the hypocrite and betrayed the Lord Jesus Christ. It is the reason why we have many of the New Testament epistles at our disposal today in order to instruct us out of spiritual apathy. To be clear the apathy that is being spoken of means that there was at one time an affection, an emotion, a love, and a life (volitionally) to the things of Christ. But now, there appears to be no interest, no sense of consequence, and no fruit bearing life.
“Paul states that we know what is good, that is, what should be done, or what should be believed, or both. But he says that there is an evil that is still present that desires to be expressed.”
The apostle Paul helps us in understanding how this specific sin functions within the human heart. In Romans Chapter 7 beginning at verse 7 and following, the apostle Paul shows us the internal battle every man goes through in his Christian life. His description of the internal struggle of what I am calling spiritual apathy seems to be a type of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde personality. Paul is very honest and candid in verse 19 and explicitly states that “for I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing.” This is very helpful for us to understand how apathy works. Paul states that we know what is good, that is, what should be done, or what should be believed, or both. But he says that there is an evil that is still present that desires to be expressed. I believe that this evil should be understood as anything, whether by action, or reclusion, that draws us away from communion with the Triune God and those He has redeemed. It also should be stated that in Paul's confession of this internal battle he does confess to having good and right affections towards God, but he is faced with the reality that there is great difficulty in acting upon them. This is why I stated earlier I do not believe the solution is more church programs or activities; activities with no real spiritual motive are useless. Rather we must come to terms that only being conformed into the image of Christ is what will destroy this apathetic heart towards God once and for all.
This of course is a lifelong process known as progressive sanctification. This is a process by which God the Holy Spirit is using and operating God's word in our lives to convict us of sin, to grant us repentance, and to empower us for obedience (2 Tim 3:16-17). All of which is His work of conforming us to the image of Christ Jesus. However, it must be noted that this progressive sanctification is not monergistic in nature and function. Rather, it is synergistic in nature and function (Phil 2:12-13). This means that as we are being sanctified by God the Holy Spirit, through his word, we are equipped and commanded to obey and comply. When the believer does not obey and comply this is what the Scriptures call grieving or quenching the Holy Spirit (Eph 4:30, 1 Thess 5:19). When grieving or quenching occurs, the believer's communion with God is disrupted or disturbed. It should be noted that a believer's union with God is never altered disturbed or revoked (Romans 5:1, 8:1). However, a believer's communion with God is certainly something that is often disturbed by various sinful proclivities (Ps 51), and it is restored through biblical repentance (Ps 32).
To understand this disturbance or unsettling of a man’s communion with God we need to consider God’s Law. We could say that this disturbance arises and finds fuel from a negligence or rejection of the first table of the law. Or, to say it another way, the man may be ignoring the first of the two greatest commandments (Matt 22:37). The second issue is then fed destructive power from this first negligence; it flows from the first and then bears apathetic fruit towards their fellow man. Specifically, and most tragically, this is fleshed out toward their wife and their children. Therefore, it should be observed that to the degree a man is in deep and consistent communion, or deep and consistent fellowship with God through His word and by His spirit, is to the degree that he will be intentionally living in a way that is seeking the gospel good, and gospel peace for those whom God has put in his life.
It does need to be asked “how does apathy show itself specifically in the lives of men within the local body?” The quick and easy answer is selfishness, lovelessness, and reclusiveness. More specifically, there is a consistent bend on self in regard to loving his wife, loving his children, and loving those within the Church. Even more specifically, it could be said that a man who is the grips of apathy will make decisions in his life that are not in the interest of the ultimate good of others; example: Not making church attendance a priority, not making family devotions a priority, not having a presence of “being” with the family mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. There is an overall disconnection from what God has called him to be; first toward God, and second toward others. All of this is symptomatic or fruit-like of the main root issue: Worship of the Triune God.
The Biblical Solution
The biblical solution must first be exactly that, biblical. Any attempt to deal with these manifest issues without consulting God’s wise and eternal counsel is frivolous. The solution also cannot be aimed at the fruit alone, it must be aimed at the root: worship that is private, family, and corporate oriented; all three of these work together, not in isolation. There must be an apprehension of the man’s identity in Christ and all of the implications that flow from that reality. He cannot continue to live under the allusion that his identity is his job, hobby, or group of friends. This can only happen if the man’s cognitive, affectional, and volitional self comes under the authority and Lordship of Jesus Christ. There are many places in God’s word that can be turned to in order to explore a biblical solution. For the purposes of this blog post, Ephesians 5 and Colossians 3 will be taken as the main consideration and starting point.
Consider Ephesians 5:1-2 Paul says something that he does not say anywhere else “Be imitators of God.” Following this statement, he then gives 13 imperatives that expound on this initial command. But before he gets to those expository commands, he makes something crystal clear. He puts forth Jesus Christ as the model in which we are to imitate God (Eph 5:2). This is the gold bar standard that Paul desires all to understand. Why? Because in commanding this (imitating God) he is not heaping up more law, he is actually providing us the answer to the how, or the source of power in carrying out this command. To see this, someone would only need to go back to chapter one and understand the deep riches a believer has in Christ because of the Father’s choosing, the work of the Son, and the application of the Holy Spirit. Therefore, when Paul commands this, it is not in a vacuum. It is not without power and provision. It is the writer’s conviction that this misapprehension is one of the culprits for discouragement within the local Body, especially among men. Many do not understand the what and the how in the relationship between indicative and imperative. Therefore, when they read a portion of scripture that gives a command “be imitators of God”, nothing but discouragement and gloom come over them. However, if they understood what God has commanded in and through the gospel, He also supplies in and through the gospel. These two verses in Ephesians chapter 5 are critical for the foundation and understanding how to deconstruct the problem of apathy within men in the local church.
The main thrust of these two verses is in the first words of verse 2 when Paul says that they were to walk in love as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us. In Paul's definition, love is not an ethereal idea or just an emotion but based upon Christ’s life and death. It is an action that is being displayed from an internal reality. It is also critical to see that the idea of love is the supreme characteristic of being an imitator of God. When this is understood the problem of apathy (the apathy of Christian men) becomes more vivid but also there is great hope because its solution is only found in Christ. Concerning this issue and reflecting upon this text, we have to conclude that Christ was not apathetic, the God of Scripture is not apathetic, therefore those who are created in His image by natural generation, and those who have been regenerated to become image bearers of the Son of God, cannot be apathetic.
Another aspect of this imitation of God, is Christ giving Himself up in sacrifice. This obviously speaks directly against the issue at hand. All Christians are called to sacrifice if they are in Jesus Christ (Matt 16:24). But men are especially called to be those agents of sacrifice within the home, within the local church, and within their communities. This sacrifice can only take place if that man is filled with God's Spirit and equipped with His word (2 Tim 3:16-17). For Christian men that are struggling with apathy, they must first realize what they have been called to. They have been called to a life of imitating Christ in all things. Jesus’ crowning act of obedience drives this point even further when He expressed verbally in Mark 14:36, “Not my will, but thine, be done.”
Men are called to be sacrificial lovers. Sacrificial lovers of God, their wives, and their children. Now with Ephesians 5:1-2 in front, verses 25-33 must be considered. Paul is now moving into the household relationships and commanding family members to treat one another in light of the Christ that he set forth in chapters 1-3. When he gets to husbands, he says the most counter-cultural statement that could be said about their wives, love them. It was common and accepted in that time within the ancient world to domineer over your wife. This was a command so radical that only a Spirit empowered believer would even remotely embrace it.
Paul graciously gives not only the “what” (love your wives), but he also provides the “how” (as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her). What should be immediately noticed is that Paul is using the same biblical logic as he did in verses one and two. Christ is his model for all external action, and He is the source for all internal power for that action. The exegetical implications are clear, Christ is to be in you that Christ may be displayed from you. This of course is something that every man must grow into. It can be concluded that this is the reason for the book of Ephesians and other New Covenant portions of Scripture; in order to instruct us on how the internal reality that He has placed in us by His Spirit may become a functioning outward display of God's glory because of the work of Christ.
When the struggling man “heart-gazes” at Christ (His love and sacrifice for His Bride), he will be empowered. Why? Because the struggling apathetic Christian man is what Christ died for and is what He is currently sanctifying. This is why Paul gives us this metaphor. It is simply meant to communicate: As Christ did this, so you do that. Again, it cannot be reiterated too often that Paul always has in his contextual thinking the reality that Christ is the source of power for what is being commanded.
In verses 29-33 we see Paul using the love of one's own body as another example of how the man is to love his wife. He simply explains that no one mistreats their body through lovelessness or neglect, but rather, there is a cherishing and nourishing that takes place. In other words, apathy is to be nowhere found in the Christian marriage relationship. The only picture and linguistic explanations we find is that of love, sacrifice, and nourishment. There should be something said about the reciprocal and cognitive nature of the marriage and Christ and His bride. If we were reading our Bibles correctly as we think about marriage we ought to think about Christ and the church, and as we think about Christ and the church, we ought to think about the examples of Christian marriage. This type of thinking exercise will help stimulate the man's heart, his mind, and his will, to carry out what God has commanded. It is an extremely high office to hold if a man is called to be a husband and a father. Why? Because in both of these offices he is commanded and called to exemplify internally, and externally, the characteristics and communicable attributes of God.
Our passage in Ephesians certainly gave us a solid foundation for considering the model in which the husband and father is to pursue Christlikeness and reject an apathetic lifestyle. But it would be helpful if we considered a more poignant or graphic passage that truly gets at the heart or the root of the issue of apathy within the Christian man. Colossians chapter 3 could be considered one of the most helpful and practical chapters in all the New Testament. The book of Colossians is constructed in a similar way as the book of Ephesians. Paul first delivers a heavy Christology in the first half of the book. He puts forth many indicatives and many doctrinal assertions that play a key role into the imperatives that he will lay down in further chapters. Chapter three begins with a conditional clause “if.” This clause is a significant issue that must be considered. Paul is essentially saying if you are converted in Christ, and you belong to Him, you will seek these things, you will set your mind on these things, there will be a reality in you and will be manifest from you.
The struggling apathetic Christian man must understand that Paul is commanding him to do something that he has indeed been empowered to do which is to seek the things that are above where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. He's been commanded to set his mind on the things that are above and not on things that are on earth. We should notice that this is a complete mental shift from the rest of the world that he has been redeemed from. The mind of apathy is a mind that is devoted to seeking things below, it is a mind that is devoted to self and has no interest in Christ or eternal things. Notice in verse one of chapter 3 the language of resurrection. The idea Paul is putting forth is that this individual has been spiritually raised to new life. However, this person still needs to be commanded to be what God has created him to be. The obvious difference at this point is the empowerment that we find in Christ; which is found in Colossians chapter one. Is also important to notice that the apathetic man must view his old life as dead and his new life is hidden with Christ in God (Col 3:3). The implications from this are clear: we are not our own, but we belong to Another.
"Gaze upon the beauty of Jesus that is found in the pages of Scripture and illuminated by God's Spirit.”
Colossians 3:5 is the hinge pin in our examination. Paul states emphatically that all the things that are earthly in us must cease to have life. But actually, he goes even further and says that we are the ones, the apathetic Christian man is the one, who is to choke the life out of those things which are contrary to the heavenly nature that God the father has put into him through His Son by His spirit. Why is this? Because the wrath of God is coming. So how is this done? How is the apathetic man going to gaze upon the Son of God in such a way that he begins to have a heart that is inflamed toward God, toward his family, and toward his community? One notable commentator states: “it is to see to it that one’s interests are centered in Christ, the one's attitudes, ambitions, and whole outlook on life are molded by Christ relation to the believer, and that one's allegiance to Him takes precedence over all earthly allegiances” In other words the man of God must have a Capernaum revolution moment. He must come to terms that Christ is his life in every respect. Not just in the macro, not just for heaven, but in the minutia. Not just when everyone is looking, but when no one is looking. There must be an all-consuming passion and desire for Christ to reign and rule over his thinking, his affections, and his decisions. This obviously is developed over a period of a lifetime, and it is intensified as this man of God who is struggling with apathy consistently gazes upon the beauty of Jesus that is found in the pages of Scripture and illuminated by God's Spirit.
BIBLIOGRAPHY
Bruce, F.F. 1984. The New International Commentary on the New Testament: The Epistles to the Colossians, To Philemon, and to the Ephesians. Grand Rapids: Eerdmans.
Dictionary, Merriam-Webster. 2022. Merriam-Webster Dictionary. May 2. Accessed May 2, 2022. https://www.merriam-webster.com/about-us/faq.
Merkle, Benjamin L. 2018. ESV Expository Commentary. Wheaton : Crossway.
Pierre, Jeremy. 2016. The Dynamic Heart in Daily Life: Connecting Christ to Human Experience. Greensboro: New Growth Press.
Vaughan, Cutis. 1981. The Expositors Bible Commentary: Colossians. Grand Rapids: Zondervan.